Hey hey! so – today is Valentines Day, or Galentines Day, or Tuesday. Potato, potatoe. AMIRIGHT? Love is a very liberal term. Being in love, falling in love, feeling love, feeling lust, feeling power – it’s all relative. You can have romantic love, friendship love, pet love – it all fills your soul and that’s what love is supposed to do for us. Full disclosure – I am watching the Bachelor while writing this. It’s the most ridiculous show ever. It’s a nice reminder of all of the craziness one must go through when finding a life partner. I think of of the reasons why I find this show so ridiculous is that everyone is focused on becoming the perfect partner for a person. Woah – woah. This is what messes people up – the idea of how it should be. There’s no ideal out there that works for everyone. Can you imagine? We’d all be dating the same people – we’d lose the spice and the essence of life and our souls! And there’s someone out there for everyone. We need to focus on the core of each other’s souls. How would you feel if someone you were interested in was picking you apart because you are too much like their ex, or- I don’t know, chew with your mouth open, or like comic books, or any other minuscule thing that doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of life? It’s important to remember that the partner that you pick will change – you will change – your life will evolve – your body will change – your personality could change – life events will send you into a tail spin – you must ask yourself – “Will this person change my diaper when I am old? How would they react if we lose everything to a fire? Do they bring a smile to my face when I see them? Do we have at least a few similiar interests that we can discuss?” It’s about finding a partner to ENHANCE your life – not to BE your life. Besides – you may even discover new things about yourself that you never knew you liked. SO – there’s my rant for today. Don’t focus so much on finding a perfect partner – enjoy the people around you and love yourself! Stop being so afraid of everyone and caring so much about what people think of you and what society thinks you should do. It’s all make believe anyways 🙂
So – to all of you out there – those of you who are suffering from lack of love, a broken heart, or just feeling like you’re not enough – NEWSFLASH – you totally are. I bet you have things that other people are envious of – even ones that you perceive to have a perfect life. It’s all relative. I came across this article last week and saved it for today – because I felt like it would be a good empowerment article. Because ultimately, at the end of the day, T’S NOT ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK ABOUT YOU – ITS ABOUT WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT YOURSELF!!!! And making sure you have a tribe of people around you that make you feel loved. But those people only appear when you are doing things you love. Novel concept, right? (PS you’ve got this – start making a list of things you love 🙂 )
Some highlights from the article –
“In the Buddhist notion of love, there’s no two candles or two souls ‘becoming one.’ Instead of facing one another, completing one another and living happily ever after (which only happens in fiction and even then they never show it, they just tell it), the Buddhist visualization of a successful marriage is this:
Two friends* facing the same direction together, symbolically east, the direction of the rising sun, as in ever-awakening fundamentally a-ok human nature. Walking the path together. Helping one another to be of benefit.” ~
In the Buddhist tradition, there’s no “tying the knot.” Space is built in.
On the other hand, it’s absolute commitment. The analogy of a snake in a bamboo tube is used. Our other half becomes “the representative of the phenomenal world,” as Trungpa Rinpoche called it—ie, the one person on earth who is stuck with you in a good way, and cares about you enough to get to know you completely, warts and all.
In the Buddhist notion of love, there’s no two candles or two souls “becoming one.” Instead of facing one another, completing one another
“But let there be spaces in your togetherness
and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but
make not a bond of love:
let it rather be a moving sea
the shores of your souls.”
So – I hope you have a fantastic day – Valentines, Galentines, whatever 🙂 just go love yourself.
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